Paybacks

Flash fiction piece for Thursday Threads at www.siobahnmuir.com this week...no title, but there is a penguin thong, which I think makes up for that.

“Luke, I said I was sorry.”

“Sorry’s not good enough this time, Jerry.”

“But we’ve pranked each other for years.”

“This one went too far.  I was going to PROPOSE that night, for God’s sake.”

“You still could have.”

“Lisa’s family never wants to see me again!”

“No sense of humor.”

“A ruined living room isn’t very funny to most people. Especially prospective in-laws.”

“That was a freak accident.  It was just honey.”

“On my girlfriend’s ass!”

“That was meant for you.  How was I supposed to know she was going to sit in the driver’s seat?”

“She’s allergic to beestings!”

“And who knew there would be bees in their front yard?”

“It’s a YARD! ”

“Well, she panicked.  I mean, who runs off and leaves a Jeep in gear?”

“Allergic!!”

“It was pretty irresponsible.”

“Nothing is ever your fault, it is?  You’re lucky she wasn’t stung.  You’d be dead.”

“See?  Bright side…I really have to wear that?”

“Jerry, the Jeep went THROUGH HER PARENTS’ LIVING ROOM WALL.”

“No one was hurt.”

“No, just banished.”

“But it isn’t enough for me to rot or repent here where none can see?”

“No.  Put on the thong.”

“But it’s got a penguin on the—“

“That’s why I picked it.”

“All right…now what?”

“Clown nose.”

“Seriously?”

“It honks.”

“And?”

“You’re going to apologize to Lisa, for putting honey on her ass.  You’re going to absolve me of guilt, and you’re going on youtube tonight.”

“This is really necessary?”

“Paybacks, Jerry, are hell.”